Saturday, May 15, 2010

Watch that first step. It's a doozy!

I have a hell of a first question for this blog.  Let's see what I can do for this one.

Dear Miss Know-It-All,
My girlfriend and I started dating about 3 months ago. We had both come out of bad relationships with men over the previous year, so we wanted to take things slow and make sure neither of us were rebounding. It has been 3 months of regular snuggling, kissing, holding hands, and being generally adorable, and I care about her a great deal. She’s been willing to “play” with me, but when I try to return the favor she gets shy, and doesn’t want me to. I’m fine with giving her more time, but I’m also really nervous that we’re going to fall into a routine of no sex. I have heard of Lesbian Bed Death, and would rather not experience it before I get any Lesbian Bed Life!
~Lovin’ the Ladies

Dear Lovin',

First of all, I just got here, and you throw out a hard question like that?  What's wrong with you?  Bitch.

Second, this problem is not going to be solved unless you talk to her directly.  I have some guesses as to why she doesn't let you touch her, but nothing is going to change if you don't actually communicate.  After that, you can address your concerns about it and maybe take your sex life to a new level.

As for things to consider, there are plenty of reasons she might be shy about being touched.  It's possible that she's just not used to receiving.  Or maybe she's ultra-sensitive.  She could just not enjoy sex but be fine with giving.  Unfortunately, since I don't know the exact reason, I can't tell you how to change the situation.  When she tells you the reason, let me know, and we'll see where to proceed from there.

--Miss Know-It-All

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